Monster Energy Drink Satan Worship

In the 1980s and 90s a bogus rumor circulated that then Proctor and Gamble CEO donated a portion of the company’s profits to the Church of Satan. The same exact rumor circulated about fashion designer Liz Claiborne. These rumors were started by someone who was either a Christian fanatic, disgruntled employee or consumer, or just some dork who decided to have some fun and invent a stupid rumor. Maybe all of the above!

Through the years rumors like these have floated around, including idiotic things like 666 appears in all product barcodes, Snapple, Marlboro, and Timberland are owned by the KKK.

Rock bands weren’t immune either. You’ll recall, if you’re old enough to remember the cool bands, it was rumored that Led Zeppelin frequently used “backward masking” to send subliminal messages to fans, as did Rush, Kiss and Black Sabbath. God I love that shit. Funny, I was a teen listening to this exact music that was supposed to make me a Satanist, or kill my parents, or whatever. My Mom and Pop are alive and well, and all I did was become an atheist. Terry Watkins is an idiot.

Well, here we go again, this time energy drinks! A Christian extremist whack-a-do, Christine Weick, has concocted a satanic Monster Energy Drink conspiracy. Her most recent public appearance, when she ranted about Jesus during a Muslim prayer meeting, isn’t really that interesting, just stupid, but the Monster Energy Drink Satan worship cult conspiracy thing is funny.

Christine Weick =On November 9th a video hit youtube and quickly went viral. In the video Christine Weick, pictured left, accused Monster Beverage Corp. of being in league with ol’ Beelzebub.

She claimed, as you can see in the video above, that the Monster Energy Logo is made of of three characters that resemble the Hebrew Letter “Waw” (or “Vav”) which is the sixth letter of the Hebrew alphabet, and so, “Vav Vav Vav” must equal “666.” Kind of logical. Very pointless, but kind of logical, if your brain happens to work that way.

According to Wikipedia.com “Waw” or “Vav” “literally means hook/peg/spear.” Okay, I’m sold. I mean, if that’s not clearly a letter satan would choose for his clandestine, evil purposes, what is? Monster Energy is obviously part of a Satanic Conspiracy.

Just a quick note: if you think Monster Energy might be satanists you should go take nappy time and maybe you’ll awake all grown up. And if you don’t want a nap, and can’t figure this out yourself, pay close attention and maybe you can actually understand why Weick’s claims are bullshit by reading the rest of this post.

Let’s begin with Exhibit A — the only exhibit required for our purposes — the Monster Logo and the Hebrew Letter “Waw” or “Vav” …
Monster Energy Logo and Letter Vav - Apokryphunk debunk

Take a look again, and carefully study the two images. Compare each of the vertical parts of the Monster Energy logo on the left to the “Vav” character on the right. It should take, oh, maybe three seconds. I’ll wait… Got it? Okay, let’s continue.

As you should notice, the only similarity between these characters is that they are in a vertical orientation and, in the case of the Monster logo, sort of resemble slashes. The character on the right does not really look the same. I mean, if you really wanted it to I guess it could kinda look like that, but it doesn’t. Not really. The Monster Energy Drink Logo looks like a claw mark, the Vav character looks like an upsidedown “L.”

Monster, large “M” logo designed to resemble slashes. Seems innocent enough.

The slash effect of the Monster Energy logo is consistent with the brand name, since monsters typically slash things with their horrific claws. Slashes are cool. Why do you think the former Guns ‘n’ Roses guitarist calls himself Slash?

It stands to reason that the minds behind the Monster Energy Drink brand probably were just looking for a cool way to represent their product, this design does the job nicely. No satanic connection required. But nothing can ever be that basic with a fringe mind. There must always be a great conspiracy.

Christine Weick and other fringe religious fanatics make connections where there are no connections and come up with idiotic ideas they feel the need to push onto others.

That’s enough about that. Don’t even get me started with “Unleash the Beast.”

911 Calls Horror of Marysville Shooting

Okay, it has nothing to do with the paranormal, but it has everything to do with abnormal! But hey, what do I know? Maybe I’m the only person who thinks this is screwed up.

Did you find this page because you thought you’d get to listen to “frantic” and “chilling” 911 calls of students and teachers in distress during the Marysville school shooting near Seattle, Washington; an unfortunate, devastating circumstance which resulted in the deaths of 5 students? Shame on you.

You want to hear kids say things like, “blood is everywhere…” ? You want to listen to their voices and hear the fear as they watch their fellow students get shot?

Zoe Galasso, 14. Killed Friday, October 24, 2014.
Gia Soriano, 14. Died Sunday, October 26, 2014.
Shaylee Chuckulnaskit, 14. Died Friday, Oct. 31.
Andrew Fryberg, 15. Died Friday, November 6, 2014.
Jaylen Fryberg, 14, died of a self-inflicted wound October 24, 2014.

Pardon my French but I’m a little ticked. We’re a fucked up society. And you know, it’s not you. You’re human, we’re human. We all do it, but it’s sad because shit like this is used to make money for the media outlets. True story…

News outlets and internet media pander to our desire to watch and listen to tragedy, because they profit from it, and we respond obediently. We have to see people getting run over, beat up, shot, and other sick and sad shit. We gawk with our mouths agape and a blank, dead stare in our eyes as some part deep in our retarded brains takes over.

We’re a nation of idiots, sheeple, lured in by tantalizing headlines promising forbidden tidbits of depravity, and we gotta have it! We give the media outlets what they want: a bump in ad views and revenue.

Sure, I lured you in with that headline, but I wanted to make this statement, not play you 911 recordings. A 911 call which relates to a violent, fatal act is not necessary information for public edification. It is sloppy management of what should be sensitive material. It’s irresponsible behavior for our 911 emergency response system and irresponsible of the media.

These kids are DEAD, GONE, never to walk in the park, ride a bike or like Neil Young sang in Rockin’ in the Free World, “…never get to fall in love, never get to be cool…”

Sad. Sad. Keep on fuckin’ up the free world.

Amityville Horror Ad Nauseum

James Brolin with axe, Amityville Horror

Still from The Amityville Horror. American International Pictures (AIP)

Holed up in an undisclosed location with my foot propped on a pillow after twisting my ankle chasing a Bigfoot off of my lawn, I cover surf Netflix TV Documentaries looking for maybe some UFO stuff, or other time-killing paranormal drivel that I may blog about. Instead I stumble upon two bowls of regurgitation on the Amityville Horror.

Margot KIdder boob shot - The Amityville HorrorTo be sure, The Amityville Horror — in it’s original form with kick ass James Brolin and cutes-as-shit Margot Kidder — is a classic movie! Freaked me out as a kid and I still like to watch now and then, even if it’s just to catch that scene where we see Margot’s booby. I love movies.

The prequel was kinda cool too, “…The Possession,” starring Rutanya Alda and Paulie, I mean Burt Young. Everything after that sucked, even the 2005 version. Mostly.

What I found today really sucked.

The Real Story: The Amityville Horror
This, an episode of the Smithsonian Channel’s “The Real Story” series, dredges up most of the same tired nonsense about the Amityville “haunting” but luckily also includes some testimony, which serves to debunk most of the tired nonsense.

Helpful is the interview with William Weber, Ron DeFeo’s defense attorney, who admits helping the Lutz’s concoct their story of a haunting at the hands of some evil, supernatural entity. Still, George Lutz defended his story until his his death in May of 2006.

You know, when I was a kid I read the book by Jay Ansen, watched the movie year or two later, got the crap scared out of me and had a good time, but even though the original printing of the novel claimed, “A True Story,” I never really thought any of it was real. I mean, come on! It’s fun to think that stuff and get a little spooked when you’re young, but at some point we have to admit to ourselves that the stuff is just entertainment and move on. Don’t we?

It’s sad that people actually go to their deathbed believing stuff like this; sadder yet that this guy knew it was hooey and went to his deathbed pretending.

So did Ed Warren. OMG, I can’t believe the Warrens take themselves seriously! Well, Lorraine now anyway. She has to be either a real clairvoyant, WHICH I DOUBT, or a real good bullshitter. Nah, she’s not that good, you can tell she’s full of shit. And maybe worse, she excels at bullshitting herself!

But even after all of it — the movies, documentaries, books, signings, lectures, public appearances — all of it quietly loading up her bank account, is she really going to say anything? Fuck no! She has to continue to delude herself or else someday someone who believed her baloney will find her and punch her in the face or something.

Anyway, it gets worse…

My Amityville HorrorMy Amityville Horror
Here is a boring documentary piece which regurgitates the same supernatural Amityville baloney but with a twist… it features amazing rock-star-like interviews with Daniel Lutz, stepson of George Lutz. Okay, they weren’t amazing, but this guy really thinks he’s something.

This documentary isn’t just boring, it’s really kind of sad. I was reading through reviews of My Amityville Horror on IMDB and was surprised to see so many positives like, “Engaging portrait…,” “Fascinating Case Study,” and then one that I finally agreed with, “88min of a guy making up stories for attention.”

Look, I won’t knock Daniel too badly, obviously the fellow has some demons on his shoulder and lived through some troubling stuff in his past. But what I witnessed watching this documentary is a guy who needs attention, and validation of some kind. As another reviewer stated at IMDB, “angry kid, turned angry adult.”

This poor guy has the wonderful displeasure of living a life post-Amityville-bullshit created by his dad. I’d really feel something for him if he just said, “You know what? It was all just bullshit. Nothing happened. My parents were in over their heads, couldn’t make the bills, my dad’s business was going down hill and they wanted out.”

Instead he perpetuates the bullshit and comes off as nothing more than a wannabe. The film fuels the wannabe aspect with snippets of Daniel playing his guitar and acting like some chain smoking tough guy in a Hollywood movie. It is, in a word, ridiculous. Oh, and Lorraine Warren is in this one too!!!

Daniel’s opening line of the trailer — there actually was a trailer for this thing — and this is verbatim, “I believe there is a such thing as evil and I was a victim of that,” maybe has more to do with his relationship with step-dad George Lutz than anything else.

Writer/Director Eric Walter seems just as full-of-self as Daniel, but hey, I’ll stop poking fun.

The stuff just didn’t work for me. It was rather pathetic, and I wish Daniel all the best moving on with his life now that he’s got some fame. Maybe he can move past his troubling childhood.

I’m probably going to hell for ripping shit on these people but hey, my ankle is feeling a little better, that’s good. Damn Bigfeet.

More to come from your’s truly, lone gunman of the apokryphunk.

Update on the State of the Strange

Still hearing that damned hum in my head, but it’s more toward the left side so I’m thinking it’s something with my ears, and not the subterranean tunnel construction rumbles emanating from some clandestine, mysterious underground base where a joint government/alien conspiracy is carrying out unthinkable lab experiments on abductees and breeding alien-human hybrids.

I’m not Fox but I taped an X on my window last night just to see if anyone would stop by, maybe give me some answers. I’m not expecting anything but I’ll keep you posted.

Welp, Halloween came and went and I failed to post anything remotely spooky for the season. My apologies. Seems that lately I’ve been focusing less on fantasy and more on reality. Shame on me. I should know better but I just can escape this sense of getting older and needing to take life a little more seriously.

Okay, that’s not wholly true. Taking life seriously should mean taking our fun just as seriously as we take our serious stuff. We have things that keep us busy, yes, and we shouldn’t let our imaginations take too much control, but there is a time and place for some form of imaginative escape.

Life should be about enjoyment, adventure, exploration and wonder. Some people go to plays, some go to movies or cover surf on Netflix, some like to watch Finding Bigfoot, Ghost Adventures or other paranormal stuff on TV (and why the hell not), and some people like to imagine that Bigfoot and ghosts are actually real.

I like to imagine too. Sometimes it’s fun to hike through the woods and pretend, a little, maybe, that there is a Sasquatch lurking somewhere just beyond where I can see. Or maybe, when my wife and I are driving along at night, it’s sometimes fun to imagine that a Dogman might leap out of the shadows alongside the road and give us a scare.

Many humans like to feel a little spooked, a little scared, that’s why Halloween Haunted Attractions are so hugely popular, and growing. People like to be scared. We like to imagine there might be something else, and have fun with it.

We just don’t need to believe it all.

Still, have a wonderful time with your imagination, it’s yours to pretend and enjoy what you will.

That’s my two cents on the State of the Strange for this week. Maybe next week I’ll post again, or maybe next year!

Mysterious Hum Heard in Eastern PA

My first experience with this strange, low frequency hum was sometime back in 2001 in New Jersey. I was in my first home, alone, sitting up in bed one night reading a book. It was very quiet, and I started noticing a very low droning noise. And I mean a very low hum not some ominous trumpeting sounds from the sky. This was a low, persistent sound.

Someone posting on a forum I visited while researching the hum described it like a tractor tailer climbing a hill in low gear and never reaching the top. That’s the most accurate description in my opinion, just a continuous motoring sound.

Similar mysterious hums have been reported by people around the world, “the Taos hum” in New Mexico for example, and other places.

The sound I heard was so low and monotonous, unordinary, that I assumed there must be something going on with my ears. I tried the usual pressure relief trick, holding my nose and creating a slight pressure to “pop” my ears, but the sound persisted, so I began making deliberate noises to see how the hum would be affected.

If anyone was watching they would have thought I was nuts. I’m sitting there in bed with a book on my lap blurting out calls of nothing in particular, “HAP! HOOOO! PSHHHH!” And making throat clearing noises. After each noise the hum would promptly return.

I spent some time looking into it, but didn’t give it too much further thought and more or less forgot about it. Since then I have noticed the hum periodically, and not just in New Jersey. I heard it while on vacation in North Carolina last year. That time my wife was beside me in bed and I asked if she had heard it too. She claimed not.

We’re living in Southeastern Pennsylvania now, and the most recent occurrence of the hum was just last night in bed, and this time my wife did hear it!

I had just switched off the light and we were laying there in the silent darkness. A few moments went by and I said, “I hear the hum again.” Then I went on to reproduce the pitch I was hearing in my head by humming a low tone.

She said, “I hear it too.”

To clarify I said, “not the hum I just made, but something else…”

She replied, “I heard it before you even said anything.”

I was ecstatic, “You did?! You heard THE HUM?! Can you hear it now?”

We were quiet for a moment and, just as the hum returned to my attention, she said, “Yep, there it is. The same low sound like you just made. Sounds like a truck on the highway.”

I said, “Yeah, but if it’s a truck on the highway it would have driven off by now. This keeps going.”

She agreed. We discussed the sound for a few minutes, between silent listening, and eventually drifted off to sleep.

This morning I came down to my studio to work. I’m a musician and was preparing to work on some recording. While I waited for my computer to boot, a relatively quiet Mac Mini, I heard the hum. That was about 9:30 this morning, May 19, 2014.

Low Frequency HumI had a cardioid vocal microphone set up so I decided to record the silent room and see if I could hear the hum in the subsequent recording. After recording for one minute I analyzed the recording with an EQ set up on the audio track. I increased the gain 20dB, cut all frequencies above 200Hz then, while the sound was playing, swept a very narrow band pass slowly from 20Hz up to hunt for the most resonant frequencies.

Tones were present at 60Hz, 90Hz, 120Hz and 180Hz, the strongest of which was at 120Hz and the second strongest at 60Hz. Based on these frequencies the origin in this case could be electrical, however the frequencies were not present in a recording with the microphone input off, so they are not originating in the equipment.

The HVAC system is off, so the only motors running in the house are a radon pump in the attic, the refrigerator and a small impeller pump and air bubbler on the fish tank. The fridge does not run constantly, the fish tank pumps are relatively quiet…

Oh crap, I think I know what the hum is: 3.5 inch Hard Drive in an external USB enclosure (metal housing), sitting on my wooden desktop. Have to test that theory later this evening when my wife is home. But to be sure, I just lifted the drive off of the desk and the hum went away :)

UPDATE: I tested the theory last night. The hum was still present, two floors up with the computer and hard drive off! The hum we are hearing is not caused by vibrations of the hard drive resonating on the desk. It’s something else. Our investigation is ongoing…

For more information on “the Hum” check these resources:
Wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Hum
Wikipedia.org/wiki/Resonance

Paranormal Investigator Advice from Amy Bruni

I just read this article at the Examiner.com and while I understand the interest in spooky ghost stories I am completely dumbfounded by how seriously paranormal “reality” shows are taken by viewers, and how successful they have been.

In our sufficiently advanced age we are entertained by, and make famous, plumbers who hunt ghosts in their spare time. Well, it’s full-time now I guess, they’re veritable rocks stars of paranormal investigation. But I guess I shouldn’t chuckle too much, our society finds celebrities in all kinds of useless TV and film. There’s no pride, no integrity, just a lot of shit.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with the plumbing trade, it’s a perfectly worthwhile profession. Certainly more worthwhile than ghost hunting, and in general it pays better, but it is funny to note that in some cases the popularized, televised investigation of nothing is actually a more lucrative endeavor.

How does one find personal fulfillment in achieving fame as a ghost hunter?
There is the money. But for integrity’s sake there are two possibilities, the famed ghost hunter is either incredibly delusional or incredibly ambitious with no ounce of shame. I’d almost prefer to think that these famous paranormal investigators are intentionally taking advantage of the gullible, riding high on a wave of stupendously ignorant TV watchers. At least then we could call them charlatans or con-artists.

But if, like most of their viewers, they actually believe that ghosts are real and huntable then they’re just as ignorant of the facts. Still, credit where credit is due for their audacity at least, they actually had the balls to pursue a career in it and record their so-called investigations on video then pitch their idea to some network.

Our species has been conjuring up ghosts and the possibility of an afterlife, or some otherwise unknown and mysterious great “beyond,” for eons. Luckily, somewhere along the way some of us figured all this was probably bullshit and some smarty pants homo sapiens said, “this doesn’t make sense…” and scientific investigation was born.

After centuries examining claims and finding no evidence to support the existence of ghosts or any other paranormal or “unexplained” thing — including but not limited to gods, spirits, demons, witchcraft, alchemy, aliens, alien abductions, lake monsters, bigfoot, etc. — and assuming that most humans generally consider this stuff relative bunk and permissible merely for entertainment sake, scientists decided to stop looking too seriously at such things and instead began to concentrate on more fruitful endeavors like stuff we could see and examine. This ultimately lead to a greater understanding of our world and our species, as well as great advances in technology, cleaning pucks for your toilet, and Advil.

Now to the main topic of this post: Never a plumber, what advice does Ghost Hunter Amy Bruni share with budding rookie paranormal investigators? One key piece of wisdom she shares is, “expect many hours of investigation with little result.”

Here ends our lesson.